Senior Homesharing With a Caregiver

Senior homeshare match-up programs bring together older home providers with individuals seeking a place to live. In exchange for providing a private room in their home, seniors receive household assistance or rent from their housemate, or a combination of the two. Participating senior home providers can either own their own home or rent a home from someone else. Though the arrangement is not right for everyone, homesharing meets the needs of many seniors and their housemates.

Before you consider homesharing for yourself or an elderly parent, find out what homesharing offers participants, how match-up programs work, and how to improve your chances of finding a compatible housemate.

Benefits of Homesharing to Seniors

Homesharing can be a good choice for roommates of any age, but there are benefits for seniors that make the arrangement particularly attractive, including:

• Independence. In many cases, having a housemate enables a senior to avoid or postpone the move to an assisted living facility. However, because potential housemates are not dedicated caregivers, senior home providers wishing to participate in these programs should be in relatively good health. (To learn about other options for seniors needing more care, read our article about Medicaid-paid home health care.)
• Rental income. An additional monthly income can help seniors on a fixed income make ends meet. Rent, if any, is negotiated between home provider and home seeker.
• Household help. Home providers who need help with cooking, laundry, gardening, and other routine chores can choose to reduce the rent in exchange for elder care or a certain number of hours of assistance.
• Transportation. Seniors who can no longer drive can request that the assistance their housemate provides includes transportation to medical appointments, the grocery store, and other places they need to go.
• Safety. A housemate offers a measure of safety for an older person who might fall or might not react quickly in an emergency.
• Companionship. For many seniors, someone to interact with on a daily basis is more valuable than the rental income or services they receive.
• Peace of mind. A housemate can provide peace of mind to the senior and his or her family and friends, who may worry about their elderly loved one living alone.

(To learn more about caring for an elder, read our article on Caring for an Elderly Relative: Where to Begin.)

Benefits of Homesharing to Potential Housemates

Potential caregivers looking for rooms to participate in homeshare programs for a variety of reasons. Many of them have free time but not a lot of money. This could be because they are students, work only part-time, have recently retired and now live on a fixed income, or any number of other reasons. Some people in such situations appreciate the opportunity to serve as a live-in caregiver in exchange for free or reduced-cost room and board. Others live far from family and appreciate the companionship and security they get from having senior roommates.

The Match-Up Process

The homeshare match-up process consists of a number of steps that take participants from application to move-in. These steps typically include:

• Application. Both the home provider and the home seeker submit an application to the program.
• Interview. Many homeshare programs have staff conduct in-person interviews with both the home provider and the home seeker. Getting to know the participants helps program staff make good matches.
• Home visit. Before beginning the matching process, a program staff member will typically make a visit to the home.
• Reference check. Home seeker references may be checked by program staff, or that may be left up to the home provider. Some programs have home seekers submit to a fingerprint check.
• Match-up. Program staff will propose a match, and the prospective housemates will meet at the home. If they feel that the match will work, the pair will proceed to draw up a homeshare agreement.
• Negotiation of homeshare agreement. Having a written agreement is important (more on this below).

While all homeshare programs bring together prospective home providers and home seekers, the extent of staff involvement in the process can vary from agency to agency. For example, some programs check references, while others leave it to the participants to do that. And some help negotiate the homeshare agreement, while others simply provide participants with guidelines and a form.

Some homeshare program coordinators make themselves available after the match is finalized, to mediate any disputes that may arise between housemates. The homeshare match-up program you choose may request a nominal fee for this service.

The Homeshare Agreement

Having a written homeshare agreement is very important. It spells out all obligations, such as rent amount and due date, and hours and types of services to be provided. It also lists any restrictions, such as what hours guests are welcome, and whether smoking or pets are allowed. Every cohabitation agreement is different because every pair of housemates has different needs.

A senior homesharing agreement should also state how much notice a participant should give before withdrawing from the program (30 days is typical). And it should spell out acceptable reasons for terminating the homeshare immediately; for example, nonpayment of rent or failure to perform services as agreed.

Although the home provider plays the role of landlord, the idea behind the homeshare concept is that housemates are equal partners. As such, both should enter the program with an equally strong commitment to making the match work.

Here are some tips for improving your chances for a successful match:

Know what you want. A home seeker who doesn't want to share a bathroom shouldn't accept a match in a one-bathroom home. Likewise, if you're a home provider and you want some daytime companionship, a housemate who works full-time during the day won't be right for you. Before you complete your application, think about what you need and want.

Be honest. This is one time when there's no benefit in hiding your flaws. Candor is key when looking for a housemate. So, if you tend to be extremely talkative or messy or have some other less-than-attractive habit or trait, say so. Your housemate will find out eventually, and being upfront about any issues will help you avoid problems after the move-in.

Be flexible. Focus on what you're getting out of the homeshare arrangement—rent, services, a low-cost place to live, or companionship—rather than minor inconveniences or annoyances. Whenever possible, try to accommodate the needs of your housemate.

Have realistic expectations. Though you may develop a close relationship with your housemate, don't assume from the start that the caregiver or senior will become like a son or daughter or a parent to you. And don't expect the relationship to go smoothly all the time. Homeshare program coordinators say that even happy housemates sometimes have disputes.

Be patient. It can take weeks or even months to find a compatible match. A good match is worth the wait. Some programs encourage prospective housemates to live together for a week or so to see if they are compatible before finalizing the match.

Finding a Homeshare Program

There are many homeshare programs in the U.S., though not every state has one. When looking for a program or information, be sure to specify which type of homesharing you're interested in: match-up or group residence. (A group residence is where individuals live cooperatively in a large, shared home.)

Some programs are open to participants of any age while others require that at least one of the participants in the match qualify as a senior. (The definition of senior varies but is often considered to be someone 55 or older.)

Here are some resources to help you locate a homeshare program:

National Shared Housing Resource Center. Visit www.nationalsharedhousing.org. Click on the "Program Directory" button for a state-by-state listing of homeshare programs. If you need additional help finding a program in your area, the organization welcomes you to email any of the directors on its board.

Local office on aging. Many states, counties, and cities offer services and information for seniors. These entities go by different names, but they typically contain the words "aging," "senior," or "elder." For example, Alabama has a Commission on Aging, Louisiana has an Office of Elderly Affairs, and Nebraskans would contact the Department of Health and Human Services-Division of Aging.

Regional housing agencies. Agencies and nonprofits that provide housing services—rental assistance, housing counseling, landlord/tenant mediation, and so on—often offer homeshare match-up services, information, or referrals. Names of these entities sometimes include "housing authority" or "housing coalition."

Nonprofit service organizations. Many homeshare programs are administered by nonprofit organizations. Catholic Charities operates programs in a number of states, as does Jewish Family Services. Look for other organizations under "independent living," "shared living," "homeshare," or "homesharing."

To learn about other types of arrangements for those seniors needing more care, get Long-Term Care: How to Plan & Pay for It, by Joseph L. Matthews (Nolo).