Planning Your Funeral or Memorial Services
by
Melanie Cullen
Writing down what you want will spare your family worry and confusion.
If you've ever settled a loved one's affairs after death, you know it can be difficult to plan a funeral or memorial service. Family and friends want to honor the person who has died, but they may not agree on what’s best. The grief and stress of loss can make decisions even more challenging. Taking the time now to document your wishes for a funeral or other memorial service can both ensure that you get the kind of services you want and provide tremendous relief for your loved ones.
Types of Memorial Services
Here is some basic information about the most common types of memorial services. Some people want all of these options; others want none. The choice is entirely yours.
Viewing. This is an opportunity for family and friends to view or sit with your body. A viewing is commonly held at a funeral home or mortuary, but you are free to choose another place -- for example, your home, a community hall, or a church.
Wake. Traditionally, a wake is a gathering to celebrate and remember the life of the person who has died. Often characterized by both sadness and gaiety, this gathering can be an important part of the grieving process, allowing family and friends the opportunity to come together and comfort each other. A wake is often held at a family home or a mortuary that offers wake services.
Funeral. A funeral is a traditional memorial ceremony, usually held in a funeral home or a church. The body is often present, in either an open or closed casket. Beyond that, there are no absolutes or requirements for planning a funeral. If the deceased person was religious, the funeral often includes a brief mass, blessing, or prayer service. Veterans may choose a military funeral, and members of many organizations (such as fraternal or 12-step groups) can choose a service that reflects the values of the organization.
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